“Hell’s Kitchen”: João is a lobster and will end up in the pot every day
Humorist Miguel Lambertini analyzes another episode of Ljubomir Stanisic’s program at SIC.
The last episode of Hell’s Kitchen, which aired on SIC that Sunday April 25th, was a real revolution. Did you see what i did here? It was also for me to be able to do silly puns made on April 25th.
The truth is that chef Ljubomir promised and delivered drastic changes. The cooks appeared without coats and the chef announced, “Let’s start over! Today I have prepared something special for you … ”The participants tried the dish in front of them and gave their opinion. Cândida hated it and was tired of saying bad things about the ravioli, which was, after all, one of Ljubomir’s signature dishes. Blatant mistake. “This is a cowboy dish.” says Ljubomir as he shoots his fingers in the air.
“Do you want dessert?” asks the boss. Competitors are suspicious because they know Ljubo won’t get any treats and because it would be stupid to serve dessert in a carton. And in fact it wasn’t a dessert called Tante de Cascais – like the already classic babysitter Tatá, Brulée – but the new coats for each individual with the colors of their new teams.
After defining the new teams, the chef presented the first challenge: “You have to build a glass tower and you can only use your left hand.” It’s one of those challenges that would be a lot more fun if they were all drunk. So it wasn’t that funny, apart from the fact that Cândida didn’t know how to tell the left from the right, which didn’t help much for the red team. The Blues managed to complete the tower in less time and won.
The second challenge of the night was to build a seafood tower that housed different types of crustaceans and mussels on each floor. For example oysters. Opening oysters is planned, but João has been on the program for six weeks and continues to open oysters like he’s doing brain surgery. When he was in the operating room for three hours trying to open an oyster, the boss asked Daniela to help João with the operation. The only problem is that Daniela can open as many oysters as Cândida: “Left at 30 meters. No right. No, the other right! Take care of the tree … ”The result was that they delayed the entire team and won the blues.
The third challenge was to prepare three different pasta dishes in 45 minutes. The chef explained that each element has a specific function in the confectionery and cannot interfere with the posts of each one. In the middle of the race, Candida literally got her hands dirty and, since she couldn’t, went to the bench for punishment. Even so, the red team’s creations were better than the blue’s. As a prize, the Reds went to the Nunes fish restaurant – the lucky ones – for dinner to enjoy a happy meal for everyone except, of course, the lobsters, which were cooked live and usually even prefer to see “All Together” at the time. “
During the mise-en-place for dinner, Daniela feels uncomfortable and asks the cook to leave. Daniela had to go to the hospital and unfortunately did not return to work.
It was kind of, “Yes, the fire is coming, but I have to go because I have an appointment at 5:30 pm now, I can’t be here.” But this was not the only victim in the red team, because at some point Cândida asks to go: “I’ll get sick there.” the competitor says calmly, as if saying that she would smoke a cigarette. When he comes back, Ljubomir asks him if he went to the Greek. Cândida turns around and boss Ljubomir freaks out and reprimands the competitor; “I swear to my two children that if they turn their backs on me if I ask you a question, they will go to the whore in the house immediately!” And rightly, Chef Ljubomir was very worried and Cândida just because she wants to vomit and almost pass out doesn’t react under conditions, she really doesn’t.
In the meantime, customers come to the restaurant, including Bárbara Norton de Matos and Tiago Teotónio Pereira, who probably came at the invitation of their aunts, nanny, Tatá, Brulée, whom they had not seen for a long time because of their imprisonment. In addition, Diogo Piçarra and João Catarré are guests at Chef Ljubomir’s VIP table. During the service, things got a little tense in the red team, especially between Lucas and João, who at least weren’t responsible for the oysters that made it possible to serve dinner in 2021. “After this service, I don’t know what to tell you,” says Ljubomir with a somewhat puzzling expression and concludes, “It was the first time that it went well for both teams. “
The chef announced that the winning team was blue and took the opportunity to pay tribute to Diogo, whom he described as an “exemplary chef”. Diogo was delighted and cried because he never imagined that one day Ljubomir would use the words “exemplary cook” and “Diogo” in the same sentence, not after drinking three bottles of wine at the end of a sunset.
Whoever Ljubomir would hardly use these words to describe him would be João. The chef was one of the nominees for the red team along with Cândida – for the sixth time – and his days on the program seemed to be over. Only not. Ljubomir announces that Daniela will give up the program and therefore sacrifices herself so that no competitor on her team is excluded. At that moment, João must have felt like the lobsters from the Nunes fish restaurant, they know that more or less will end up in the pot, but in the meantime they will enjoy the time they left in the aquarium.